Well my first 6 weeks of the Heidi Somers training program are completed and I thought I would give a review of not only the program, but of her.
In regards to the program:
It is an online training program. I paid for 6 weeks of meal and strength training. It cost me less than $200. She responded in less than 24 hours on my inquiry, and she had my meals and exercises ready about a week after I sent her payment via PayPal. My meals were the same for all 6 weeks, and she detailed my breakfast, lunch, dinner, post workout, and snacks on the meal plan. There were a few items that I changed after her acceptance of the changes. One of them was a cabbage dish, I personally am not a fan of cabbage so I swapped it with Spinach. And the other was grapefruit. Now I love grapefruits, but for the past two weeks the ones I picked up at the market were not good, so I switched to oranges. With an online program, you still are your sole motivator. She laid the foundation for me, and I had to follow it. There were days I didn't work out due to time maintenance or being sick, and there were times when I cheated on my diet. In the end, I know it was my cheat days that really hindered me from losing more inches and weight.
The Flaws of the Program:
This is just in general to any online program. You have to do all the work. No one is going to cook your food for you, no one is going to be at the gym telling you to do it again, or lift hard, or walk more. It's all you. And it's very easy to mentally break down, but you have to want it. At the end of the day, it is your sole responsibility to get out of the rut you physically put yourself into.
In regards to Heidi:
I had followed Heidi on Instagram and YouTube, so I knew she was a BioRhythm athlete and spokesperson, and to be honest, I was fearful that she was going to be just like every other nutritionist or trainer that I spoke to and start selling me a ton of products. She never once mentioned BioRhythm in the 6 weeks we've worked together. She did not try to sell me on any products whatsoever. She did mention 3 supplements that I should take, but they could be found at my local vitamin store. Thru emails you can tell she has a very bubbly and friendly personality. 90% of the time she responded within 48 hours of my emails. She seems very knowledgeable about her chosen career field, and when it came to preparing my plan, it appeared that she took time to research my physical capabilities and I was never hungry.
The Downsides I Faced with Heidi:
There was one particular week that my email was overlooked and I had to email her again to take a look at it. After that she did work hard to make up for that error. I think she could personally be more active in checking in with her clients and I say that knowing full well it is expected that the Client is suppose to check in with her once a week at minimum. I just think it would mean a bit more to her clients, if she also did random check-ins. Just a simple text or email, asking if everything is going well, anything need to be changed, or for my case "GET YOUR ASS UP AND GO TO THE GYM"
Just in general with online trainers, I wonder how many clients they have to give a sort of individualized attention that each client needs. Not every body is created equal, and I know for me I'm a rather large client with way different needs than others.
Overall:
I lost 17 pounds, and I'll have to look back at my journal to see the inches I lost. But I definitely didn't gain. And I even purchased another 16 weeks with Heidi for the following reasons.
1) I can't do this on my own.
2) I spent 3 months searching and she's the only one to offer to help.
3) I know if I was 100% committed, I can do better on my weight loss.
4) I faced one "flaw" with her in 6 weeks time, not bad.
I think I'm going to commit myself to working with Heidi for a year. I want to not be this size anymore and I want to make it work. I can be a completely better version of myself with her help.
Check out Heidi Somers on the following platforms.
Heidi Somers YouTube
Heidi Somers Instagram
Heidi Somers Facebook
Friday, November 7, 2014
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
Round 2 - Get Lean by 2015
As I mentioned in my previous post, I purchased another 16 weeks with Heidi Somers. That's four months of her helping me GET LEAN BY 2015. I'll break it up into 4 week segments and post monthly results.
Overall Goals this time around.
I want to get below 400 lbs. I want to be a size smaller in ALL brands of jeans that I own. I few of them are baggy on the waist now, but I have like 4 brands of jeans and of course clothes are never universal.
I have a cruise lined up for Mid-December, so by that time I'd like to be able to walk 3 miles at one time without stopping. I'm going to shoot for 1.5 hours to complete but I pretty sure I can beat that on the treadmill. I'm going to Cozumel with my Best Friend and I want to be able to keep up with the group while we tour the Mayan Ruins, I don't want to ruin her experience because she has to stay behind with me. Plus I hear that the food is great and available at every corner on a cruise, so I want to know I can resist temptation.
And most of all, I want to not cheat on my diet this time around. I know sometimes going to the gym is impossible to due my body saying no, or just my school schedule saying No to gym but Yes to sleep. I do not want to waiver from my select diet plan.
I need to find a meal replacement bar that I can grab and go to keep in my purse for days that I don't make it home for lunch due to being hectic at work. I know I've bough Quest Bars several times, but I wonder if that's the best High Protein, Low Carb/Low Sugar bar out there.
Overall Goals this time around.
I want to get below 400 lbs. I want to be a size smaller in ALL brands of jeans that I own. I few of them are baggy on the waist now, but I have like 4 brands of jeans and of course clothes are never universal.
I have a cruise lined up for Mid-December, so by that time I'd like to be able to walk 3 miles at one time without stopping. I'm going to shoot for 1.5 hours to complete but I pretty sure I can beat that on the treadmill. I'm going to Cozumel with my Best Friend and I want to be able to keep up with the group while we tour the Mayan Ruins, I don't want to ruin her experience because she has to stay behind with me. Plus I hear that the food is great and available at every corner on a cruise, so I want to know I can resist temptation.
And most of all, I want to not cheat on my diet this time around. I know sometimes going to the gym is impossible to due my body saying no, or just my school schedule saying No to gym but Yes to sleep. I do not want to waiver from my select diet plan.
I need to find a meal replacement bar that I can grab and go to keep in my purse for days that I don't make it home for lunch due to being hectic at work. I know I've bough Quest Bars several times, but I wonder if that's the best High Protein, Low Carb/Low Sugar bar out there.
Week 6 - Final Week & Results
Well I finally got a hold of Heidi. She answered my question, and since then had been actively communicating with me.
There was nothing phenomenal that occurred during week 6 either. I followed the diet and worked out for 5 days.
As for my results. I lost a total of 17 lbs. Yay me!!
Overall my experience on this program was great. 90% of the time Heidi was communicative and I was motivated.
I cheated on my meals every now and then, and I had my ups and down with exercising. I think I could have lost more weight if I was 100% committed. Who knew that during these particular 6 weeks, I was going to go thru an emotional roller coaster with my personal life.
I ended up purchasing the 16 week plan from Heidi. I have a cruise planned for mid December and I want to not be winded from all the touristy walking and constant step climbing I'll be doing on the boat. I also want to reach my goal of being under 400 lbs, and I'd like to go a pant size down in all the different types of jeans that I owe.
Where I saw myself falter was in the time maintenance department. I started off really hard and strong in the beginning, with meal prepping and having everything prepared and ready for a "Grab and Go" situation, but then as I got flustered with school and work and family situation, I saw my meal/snack prep just deplete, and it was in those times that something convenient always won out in the end.
I want to be better, I just need to do it. There are no excuses in this lifestyle journey I'm trying to make. I think I could have seen a lot better results if I fully committed. But now that I know what I did wrong, I can make myself better in these next 4 months with Heidi.
Round 2 here we come!
There was nothing phenomenal that occurred during week 6 either. I followed the diet and worked out for 5 days.
As for my results. I lost a total of 17 lbs. Yay me!!
Overall my experience on this program was great. 90% of the time Heidi was communicative and I was motivated.
I cheated on my meals every now and then, and I had my ups and down with exercising. I think I could have lost more weight if I was 100% committed. Who knew that during these particular 6 weeks, I was going to go thru an emotional roller coaster with my personal life.
I ended up purchasing the 16 week plan from Heidi. I have a cruise planned for mid December and I want to not be winded from all the touristy walking and constant step climbing I'll be doing on the boat. I also want to reach my goal of being under 400 lbs, and I'd like to go a pant size down in all the different types of jeans that I owe.
Where I saw myself falter was in the time maintenance department. I started off really hard and strong in the beginning, with meal prepping and having everything prepared and ready for a "Grab and Go" situation, but then as I got flustered with school and work and family situation, I saw my meal/snack prep just deplete, and it was in those times that something convenient always won out in the end.
I want to be better, I just need to do it. There are no excuses in this lifestyle journey I'm trying to make. I think I could have seen a lot better results if I fully committed. But now that I know what I did wrong, I can make myself better in these next 4 months with Heidi.
Round 2 here we come!
Friday, October 24, 2014
Week 5 - [Insert Big Dramatic Sigh]
Things were going well. I hadn't missed a day of working out or eating properly. I was feeling good. Then Thursday happened.
I had this goal. Get up early, go to the gym for 2 hours, detail my car, clean my apartment, and then go back to the gym for another hour of cardio and strength training. It was a good goal for my day off.
I was an hour off schedule to go to the gym, only because after a week of phone tag I finally got to talk to my best friend. So it was a well deserved distraction.
Anyway, I get to the gym and walked my mile and did it under 25 minutes. I'm getting better at that. Then I went to the free weights and did some toe touches, knee lifts, and some stretches. Then on my way to weight machines I decided to stop by the locker room and weigh myself.
Here's my thinking. I have a heavy duty standard "analog" scale. You know the one that maxes out at 300 lbs, so it spins around again for your weight. That's what I have, and that's what I've been using to determine my starting weight and my current weight.
I'm 15-20 lbs away from being at the 400 lb mark. Which to me, I'm classifying that as a milestone. I don't know how long I've been over 400 lbs but getting there makes me excited to know I never want to be this weight again.
Anyway, I wanted to weigh myself so I can take a picture of the numbers and do a happy dance for when I finally cross that under 400 lbs threshold.
Now I know that not all scales are created equal, but fucking shit, this one was DRASTICALLY different. When I first hopped on it said that I weighed 456 lbs. Which not only is almost 30 lbs more than what my at home scale says I weigh, but it's also 23 lbs more than what I thought my starting weight was. I was so taken aback by this. I sat for a second and drank my water and tried really hard to get out of my head. I went to the weight machines and really worked my biceps and triceps until they were cooked spaghetti. Then did some leg presses. After I was done with those I decided to go back into the locker room to weigh myself again. I just couldn't believe that number. I hopped on again and it said I weight 443.4 lbs. Now seriously, there is no way I lost 12.6 lbs in just 20 minutes of predominantly arm workouts.
So maybe the scale is calibrated wrong. I'm not sure. I still don't like those numbers being that high. I realistically know I've lost both pounds and inches so I should feel good, but honestly I don't.
Seeing that number makes me realize I'm further away from the Under 400lb Milestone I want to reach. And what if the gym scale is more accurate than my at home scale? That means that my starting weight was worse than what I originally thought. And thinking that makes me feel utterly disgusted in myself.
How can a person walk at such a huge weight? Let alone be alive at that weight without being riddled with diseases. I mean I didn't have high blood pressure, my cholesterol isn't high, I am pre-diabetic, but not diabetic enough for my doctors to have given me metformin or any other pill that lowers blood sugar.
I'm beyond discouraged. I wanted to cry and eat a dozen cookies. I logically know that it took me 25 years of bad eating to get to this weight, and I know there is not some magical pill to make me lose 100 lbs over night. But I feel like it's a set back. And yes losing, close to 15 lbs in a month is a great goal to achieve. It's better than gaining weight or staying the same.
Can't I just be upset for a while? Maybe this is the motivation I need to kick my ass in to gear.
And to top off my shitty Thursday, my rent is going up $25. I hate that, but I also decreased my phone bill by $100 so it will all work out. I just needed to vent.
And lastly, it has been seven days since I sent my trainer that email. I wanted to renew with her for another 12 to 16 weeks thinking we can really kick it into gear, but now I'm somewhat second guessing that. But I know there's no way I can do this on my own, and if I struggled to find someone to help me before, I doubt that will miraculously change.
[insert big dramatic sigh]
Well here's the number on that stupid gym scale. God I hate looking at it. But the only silver lining I have to all of this, is that when the gym scale dips below the 400 mark, I can then do a mini celebratory dance!!
I had this goal. Get up early, go to the gym for 2 hours, detail my car, clean my apartment, and then go back to the gym for another hour of cardio and strength training. It was a good goal for my day off.
I was an hour off schedule to go to the gym, only because after a week of phone tag I finally got to talk to my best friend. So it was a well deserved distraction.
Anyway, I get to the gym and walked my mile and did it under 25 minutes. I'm getting better at that. Then I went to the free weights and did some toe touches, knee lifts, and some stretches. Then on my way to weight machines I decided to stop by the locker room and weigh myself.
Here's my thinking. I have a heavy duty standard "analog" scale. You know the one that maxes out at 300 lbs, so it spins around again for your weight. That's what I have, and that's what I've been using to determine my starting weight and my current weight.
I'm 15-20 lbs away from being at the 400 lb mark. Which to me, I'm classifying that as a milestone. I don't know how long I've been over 400 lbs but getting there makes me excited to know I never want to be this weight again.
Anyway, I wanted to weigh myself so I can take a picture of the numbers and do a happy dance for when I finally cross that under 400 lbs threshold.
And here is where my world went dark.
Now I know that not all scales are created equal, but fucking shit, this one was DRASTICALLY different. When I first hopped on it said that I weighed 456 lbs. Which not only is almost 30 lbs more than what my at home scale says I weigh, but it's also 23 lbs more than what I thought my starting weight was. I was so taken aback by this. I sat for a second and drank my water and tried really hard to get out of my head. I went to the weight machines and really worked my biceps and triceps until they were cooked spaghetti. Then did some leg presses. After I was done with those I decided to go back into the locker room to weigh myself again. I just couldn't believe that number. I hopped on again and it said I weight 443.4 lbs. Now seriously, there is no way I lost 12.6 lbs in just 20 minutes of predominantly arm workouts.
So maybe the scale is calibrated wrong. I'm not sure. I still don't like those numbers being that high. I realistically know I've lost both pounds and inches so I should feel good, but honestly I don't.
Seeing that number makes me realize I'm further away from the Under 400lb Milestone I want to reach. And what if the gym scale is more accurate than my at home scale? That means that my starting weight was worse than what I originally thought. And thinking that makes me feel utterly disgusted in myself.
How can a person walk at such a huge weight? Let alone be alive at that weight without being riddled with diseases. I mean I didn't have high blood pressure, my cholesterol isn't high, I am pre-diabetic, but not diabetic enough for my doctors to have given me metformin or any other pill that lowers blood sugar.
I'm beyond discouraged. I wanted to cry and eat a dozen cookies. I logically know that it took me 25 years of bad eating to get to this weight, and I know there is not some magical pill to make me lose 100 lbs over night. But I feel like it's a set back. And yes losing, close to 15 lbs in a month is a great goal to achieve. It's better than gaining weight or staying the same.
Can't I just be upset for a while? Maybe this is the motivation I need to kick my ass in to gear.
And to top off my shitty Thursday, my rent is going up $25. I hate that, but I also decreased my phone bill by $100 so it will all work out. I just needed to vent.
And lastly, it has been seven days since I sent my trainer that email. I wanted to renew with her for another 12 to 16 weeks thinking we can really kick it into gear, but now I'm somewhat second guessing that. But I know there's no way I can do this on my own, and if I struggled to find someone to help me before, I doubt that will miraculously change.
[insert big dramatic sigh]
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
First Flaw with Online Trainer
Well I ended up finding my first flaw with this whole online trainer business.
Don't get me wrong, I'm fully understanding of a person's busy schedule. I'm not Heidi's only client, and I'm sure she has her own personal life and possibly her own work/school schedule to deal with.
I had emailed her Friday October 17th, my weekly check in as well as a question I had. I wanted to know what the best order to complete my work out was in order to optimize fat burning.
I'm on IG and I follow several fitness accounts, and one of the pictures stated that the first 15 minutes of the work out targets carbs and sugar and after 30 minutes you enter the fat burning phase, so it was more ideal to do strength training first then end it with cardio so that way the cardio is 100% fat burner.
I wanted to know the validity of that statement, and I have yet to hear back from her and it's been 5 days. Once again, I'm aware she is busy, but from my perspective that's been 5 work outs that I could have done more effectively if I knew the answer to my question.
Don't get me wrong, I'm fully understanding of a person's busy schedule. I'm not Heidi's only client, and I'm sure she has her own personal life and possibly her own work/school schedule to deal with.
I had emailed her Friday October 17th, my weekly check in as well as a question I had. I wanted to know what the best order to complete my work out was in order to optimize fat burning.
I'm on IG and I follow several fitness accounts, and one of the pictures stated that the first 15 minutes of the work out targets carbs and sugar and after 30 minutes you enter the fat burning phase, so it was more ideal to do strength training first then end it with cardio so that way the cardio is 100% fat burner.
I wanted to know the validity of that statement, and I have yet to hear back from her and it's been 5 days. Once again, I'm aware she is busy, but from my perspective that's been 5 work outs that I could have done more effectively if I knew the answer to my question.
Monday, October 20, 2014
That's all that matters
My Granny had asked me this weekend what my motivation to truly start this was. A lot of overweight people go thru the Fad dieting and Yo-Yo dieting and I myself have tried a lot of things. Atkins, South Beach, Weight Watchers, counting calories etc. And for some reason since May I had been doing physical activity pretty regularly, and from June thru September I had been actively seeking help.
I'd like to say that there was a boy who broke my heart and getting fit was going to be my ultimate revenge, because that would make sense. But to be quite honest, I didn't have a trigger. I don't know what caused me to finally pursue this adventure. It's the longest I've ever stuck with a lifestyle change in my entire life. I'm happy that I enjoy it.
In the past year, I've gained more self confidence. Don't get me wrong, I still hate staring at myself in the mirror, and I over analyze every photo taken of me, and I get grossed out with how I look on camera, but when I don't see myself in a reflection or a photo, I walk with my head held high, and I leave the house looking as best as I can. I wear cute clothes that accentuate my curves and are comfortable, my make up makes me feel good, and my hair is, well I wish my hair would do more, but I'm fine with it.
I'm covered with physical imperfections and I'm not everyone's ideal body type. But even as a large girl, I've been in love and lust and I've fallen madly in love with someone and I've gotten my heart broken just like a size zero girl has.
I wasn't even bullied when I was younger. I went to a small school, and every once in a while a new kid or some stupid boy from elementary school would say I was fat. But I grew up with a brother who picked on me and he taught me to not only grow thick skin, but to defend myself. So I did. And when high school came, everyone knew me. People either liked me or hated me, but it had nothing to do with my weight. If they made a comment, "fat ass bitch" was pretty common, I agreed with them. I do have a fat ass and I am a bitch. Their words never hurt me, because they couldn't insult my intelligence or anything of substance. I could lose my weight, but they would still have a bitter heart. It truly never bothered me, I don't remember ever crying over someone being so mean as to insult my physical appearance. I just didn't care.
Most of the "bullying" came from my paternal grandparents. I can wholeheartedly say I hated my grandfather and I truly dislike my grandmother. Leaving out the way they treated my father (their son) and my mother and brother, the words they spoke to me as a child made me grow really thick skin, and the words spoken to me as an adult just validated my disliking for them and lost respect.
My grandfather would also tell me a variation of the following sayings.
"You're going to end up a failure like your Dad."
"You'll never get a man if you keep eating"
"You're getting fatter."
"If you keep eating then you'll never be happy"
'Why can't you be more like your cousins."
Keep in mind, he wasn't a slim man, he had a gut.
My grandmother said some of those sayings as well, but as I got older she tried to bribe me.
"If you lose weight, I'll buy you a new wardrobe."
"Men like pretty girls, you have work to do."
"(Insert dramatic sigh) I don't think you'll ever have children."
"What type of life do you live looking like that."
Once again, she was not a slim woman. She probably fluctuated from a size 14-22 all my life.
I'd like to say that their words gave me motivation. But considering my grandfather died when I was in middle school, and I see my grandmother only once a year, it didn't. Yeah they were probably the foundation in which I emotionally ate, but I just don't know the reason I started this. Does it matter?
Whether I'm only active for 30 minutes or for 2 hours, I'm doing more now than I ever done, and I'm seeing the number on the scale decrease, and I measure myself at the beginning and end of each month and the numbers either decrease or they stay the same, they have not increased. That's the end result right? Be a better version of yourself.
A lot of bigger girls know that to make up for their appearance they develop a kick ass personality. And yeah, I've got a great personality. I'm not every one's cup of tea, but I am quick witted, and super sarcastic, and I try to make dull mundane things fun. I enjoy being goofy and laughing. I can be both sharp and tough or soft and sweet. I like who I am, and I like who I'm becoming.
I'd like to say that there was a boy who broke my heart and getting fit was going to be my ultimate revenge, because that would make sense. But to be quite honest, I didn't have a trigger. I don't know what caused me to finally pursue this adventure. It's the longest I've ever stuck with a lifestyle change in my entire life. I'm happy that I enjoy it.
In the past year, I've gained more self confidence. Don't get me wrong, I still hate staring at myself in the mirror, and I over analyze every photo taken of me, and I get grossed out with how I look on camera, but when I don't see myself in a reflection or a photo, I walk with my head held high, and I leave the house looking as best as I can. I wear cute clothes that accentuate my curves and are comfortable, my make up makes me feel good, and my hair is, well I wish my hair would do more, but I'm fine with it.
I'm covered with physical imperfections and I'm not everyone's ideal body type. But even as a large girl, I've been in love and lust and I've fallen madly in love with someone and I've gotten my heart broken just like a size zero girl has.
I wasn't even bullied when I was younger. I went to a small school, and every once in a while a new kid or some stupid boy from elementary school would say I was fat. But I grew up with a brother who picked on me and he taught me to not only grow thick skin, but to defend myself. So I did. And when high school came, everyone knew me. People either liked me or hated me, but it had nothing to do with my weight. If they made a comment, "fat ass bitch" was pretty common, I agreed with them. I do have a fat ass and I am a bitch. Their words never hurt me, because they couldn't insult my intelligence or anything of substance. I could lose my weight, but they would still have a bitter heart. It truly never bothered me, I don't remember ever crying over someone being so mean as to insult my physical appearance. I just didn't care.
Most of the "bullying" came from my paternal grandparents. I can wholeheartedly say I hated my grandfather and I truly dislike my grandmother. Leaving out the way they treated my father (their son) and my mother and brother, the words they spoke to me as a child made me grow really thick skin, and the words spoken to me as an adult just validated my disliking for them and lost respect.
My grandfather would also tell me a variation of the following sayings.
"You're going to end up a failure like your Dad."
"You'll never get a man if you keep eating"
"You're getting fatter."
"If you keep eating then you'll never be happy"
'Why can't you be more like your cousins."
Keep in mind, he wasn't a slim man, he had a gut.
My grandmother said some of those sayings as well, but as I got older she tried to bribe me.
"If you lose weight, I'll buy you a new wardrobe."
"Men like pretty girls, you have work to do."
"(Insert dramatic sigh) I don't think you'll ever have children."
"What type of life do you live looking like that."
Once again, she was not a slim woman. She probably fluctuated from a size 14-22 all my life.
I'd like to say that their words gave me motivation. But considering my grandfather died when I was in middle school, and I see my grandmother only once a year, it didn't. Yeah they were probably the foundation in which I emotionally ate, but I just don't know the reason I started this. Does it matter?
Whether I'm only active for 30 minutes or for 2 hours, I'm doing more now than I ever done, and I'm seeing the number on the scale decrease, and I measure myself at the beginning and end of each month and the numbers either decrease or they stay the same, they have not increased. That's the end result right? Be a better version of yourself.
A lot of bigger girls know that to make up for their appearance they develop a kick ass personality. And yeah, I've got a great personality. I'm not every one's cup of tea, but I am quick witted, and super sarcastic, and I try to make dull mundane things fun. I enjoy being goofy and laughing. I can be both sharp and tough or soft and sweet. I like who I am, and I like who I'm becoming.
Week 5 - Day 1 - Fingers Crossed
I shaved 5 minutes off my mile time this weekend. I really pushed myself to go faster, and I'm not saying I pushed myself harder than I should have, but my breath was out of control. Luckily it doesn't take too long for me to catch my breath, but I should have increased it a tad more gradual. But it did get my heart pumping and get me sweating, so I still felt good afterward.
I'm on track to being under 400 lbs soon. I really want to kick ass and go hard this next week and so how close I get to being under that mark. I don't really know the last time I weighed less than 400 lbs. I haven't owned a scale for long.
FINGERS CROSSED!
Friday, October 17, 2014
Body Changes and Plus Size Clothing
So this is an image I see floating around Instagram quite a lot. When I look in the mirror, I don't see many changes in my body. Granted, there is only a certain amount of time I want to stare at myself naked, before my self-esteem just plummets to the ground.
But I did notice that I can no longer wear a pair of capri pants that I own. I hate wearing belts on my pants, because they make me feel bulky and they always poke thru my shirts so I tend to avoid them. These capris fit loose on my waist, so I kept having to pull them up, and they were really loose around my thighs and knees and they basically made me look really frumpy that day.
Which is a good thing. The one thing I pride myself on is not being a stereotypical fat girl. I dress to flatter my curves, and accentuate my breasts or my butt or whatever I can so I look decent on the outside, but feel good on the inside. I can walk out of my house with my head held high because I know I look good to my taste.
I was the frumpy fat girl all thru high school, because we didn't have much money and I never learned to dress like a curvy girl. I probably really didn't start dressing this way til I was 19, and then by the age of 22 I started really dressing better than I ever did. I started taking a lot more pride in my appearance. My make up game is on point, and my clothes are as cute as can be. It makes me wish I took advantage of my smaller self when I was younger to dress prettier, but I pay for my clothes now, and yeah plus size clothing is so expensive, so there is no way my parents could have afforded what I wear now. It's been a major "If I knew then what I know now" type of moments.
About a year ago I started being more adventurous with what I wear. I usually stuck with Dark denim jeans and some sort of black or red top. Usually a t-shirt or tunic. Now I own a very royal blue blue jeans, and lavender capris, and polka dot capris, as well as prints on my tops. I no longer just wear a solid color dark top. I have an assortment of colors and I've even wore white. I gained a lot more confidence in the past year, and I can't wait to see where I'll be when I'm thru with this 6 week program.
I like Heidi. I think I'll actually buy her 8 or 12 week program next. Might just make a year long commitment to her, because with her help, I've noticed inches come off me, and pounds come of the scale. I think if I go strong and hard these next two weeks I could be under 400 lbs. Which would be completely amazing!!
Week 4 - Days 2-6 - F*CK YOU ALLERGIES
Well I live in Texas and our weather is definitely all season in one week. I've been loving the fall temperatures we've been feeling lately, but that took a toll on me this week.
Monday was good. I did a lot of cardio and some weight training and I was feeling good thinking I could do more than scheduled for this week, until Tuesday came along and knocked me on my ass.
Tuesday thru Thursday I was sick. Sinus pressure headaches that turned into migraines, and dry heaving bouts that made me wish I would just vomit already. Does anyone else feel 10x better after they vomit? I know I do.
I stocked up on allergy pills, emergen-c packets and ramen noodles. Ramen noodles are not part of my diet plan, but when I was only eating ezekial bread and this, I figure, whatever it's my "cheat" meal for the 6 week program. I'm so super picky on chicken noodle soup, that I realized my goal this winter is to come up with my own "healthier" chicken broth to have when I am sick. Maybe I can add the Quest Nutrition noodles to it, so it will be the better choice than SODIUM INTENSE RAMEN NOODLES. But damn I sure do love the convenience of 3 minute soup. Plus it's crazy cheap, I think I paid 15 cents a package.
Tuesday thru Thursday, I didn't work out. I rested, and I did a few at home strength training items that Heidi had listed, but between the headaches and the body aches and the dry heaving, I greatly enjoyed reading in bed and napping.
I'm a huge advocate for the emergen-c packets. Usually when people around me are starting to get sick or I feel like I'm not at 100%, I will either take a few more Vit-C pills or if it's a dire situation, I'll reach for the emergen-c. I think it definitely helped me this go round.
Today is Friday, and I am feeling 100% better. I still am taking the day off from the gym, so 1) I can be 100% mentally and physically but 2) it's my Granny's 80th Birthday weekend, so tonight I'm having dinner with her and my gym closes at 9pm on Fridays. BOO.
But I am all scheduled to hit the gym on Saturday and Sunday, and I'm even trying to schedule a little hiking session on Saturday to get some extra cardio in.
Week 5 - I'm really going to kick my ass in gear. There should be no excuses this time around.
Monday was good. I did a lot of cardio and some weight training and I was feeling good thinking I could do more than scheduled for this week, until Tuesday came along and knocked me on my ass.
Tuesday thru Thursday I was sick. Sinus pressure headaches that turned into migraines, and dry heaving bouts that made me wish I would just vomit already. Does anyone else feel 10x better after they vomit? I know I do.
I stocked up on allergy pills, emergen-c packets and ramen noodles. Ramen noodles are not part of my diet plan, but when I was only eating ezekial bread and this, I figure, whatever it's my "cheat" meal for the 6 week program. I'm so super picky on chicken noodle soup, that I realized my goal this winter is to come up with my own "healthier" chicken broth to have when I am sick. Maybe I can add the Quest Nutrition noodles to it, so it will be the better choice than SODIUM INTENSE RAMEN NOODLES. But damn I sure do love the convenience of 3 minute soup. Plus it's crazy cheap, I think I paid 15 cents a package.
Tuesday thru Thursday, I didn't work out. I rested, and I did a few at home strength training items that Heidi had listed, but between the headaches and the body aches and the dry heaving, I greatly enjoyed reading in bed and napping.
I'm a huge advocate for the emergen-c packets. Usually when people around me are starting to get sick or I feel like I'm not at 100%, I will either take a few more Vit-C pills or if it's a dire situation, I'll reach for the emergen-c. I think it definitely helped me this go round.
Today is Friday, and I am feeling 100% better. I still am taking the day off from the gym, so 1) I can be 100% mentally and physically but 2) it's my Granny's 80th Birthday weekend, so tonight I'm having dinner with her and my gym closes at 9pm on Fridays. BOO.
But I am all scheduled to hit the gym on Saturday and Sunday, and I'm even trying to schedule a little hiking session on Saturday to get some extra cardio in.
Week 5 - I'm really going to kick my ass in gear. There should be no excuses this time around.
Monday, October 13, 2014
Week 4 - Day 1 - Cardio and Food Porn
So I'm not exactly sure what the city has been putting in my tap water, but whatever it is has been giving me so much energy.
Saturday I walked for 45 minutes and rode the stationary bike for 20 minutes then proceeded with strength training.
But Sunday (Day 1 of Week 4) I had a fuck ton of energy. I ended up walking on the treadmill for a whole hour without stopping and I was doing moderate to fast intervals. I couldn't be more excited, I don't think the last time I did that was when I was touring Washington D.C. with my best friend and we just ended up walking the city for like 8 hours at a leisurely pace.
So fucking happy for myself. After my cardio session I ended up strength training for close to two hours.
Then came home, cleaned up my apartment, did homework then made me a yummy dinner of Baked Cod, Steamed Broccoli and an Oven Baked Sweet Potato.
Now if the rest of week 4 can be like Day 1, then I should feel the weight shedding off of me.
Saturday I walked for 45 minutes and rode the stationary bike for 20 minutes then proceeded with strength training.
But Sunday (Day 1 of Week 4) I had a fuck ton of energy. I ended up walking on the treadmill for a whole hour without stopping and I was doing moderate to fast intervals. I couldn't be more excited, I don't think the last time I did that was when I was touring Washington D.C. with my best friend and we just ended up walking the city for like 8 hours at a leisurely pace.
Then came home, cleaned up my apartment, did homework then made me a yummy dinner of Baked Cod, Steamed Broccoli and an Oven Baked Sweet Potato.
Now if the rest of week 4 can be like Day 1, then I should feel the weight shedding off of me.
Week 3 - Days 3-7
Nothing really horrible happened during these days.
I've been so busy with work and school, but I did manage to go to the gym for 5 of the 7 days.
A few of the days I forgot to eat until dinner time just because I was so busy. I need to keep almonds and some fruit in my purse when I remember.
On to Week 4!!!
I've been so busy with work and school, but I did manage to go to the gym for 5 of the 7 days.
A few of the days I forgot to eat until dinner time just because I was so busy. I need to keep almonds and some fruit in my purse when I remember.
On to Week 4!!!
Monday, October 6, 2014
Week 3 - Day Two - A Little Pick Me Up
This is going to be a short and sweet post!
It's only 8:30 on Monday morning, and I woke up thinking I was going to have another serious case of the Mondays. I woke up late, I know I didn't have time to make me a real breakfast. Before I walked out the door I grabbed an apple and a banana. I keep my scale in my kitchen, and I decided to just hop on real quick.
It's only 8:30 on Monday morning, and I woke up thinking I was going to have another serious case of the Mondays. I woke up late, I know I didn't have time to make me a real breakfast. Before I walked out the door I grabbed an apple and a banana. I keep my scale in my kitchen, and I decided to just hop on real quick.
I LOST 8 LBS!!!!
8 fucking pounds! I'm so giddy, I think it was the determination I needed to get thru this week and keep progressing!!
Friday, October 3, 2014
Week Two: Days 1-5: Time Management and Sadness
I made it to week two of the Heidi Somers' coaching plan. I'm not dead nor am I starving. Go figure.
This week hasn't been the greatest. While I am on track with my diet and following her plan, my time management skills have been lacking on making it to the gym. I've done the at-home exercises she listed, but I haven't found the time to do the cardio. I had a semi huge exam for one of my classes that I didn't feel prepared for, so I was staying up til 1 am almost every night studying. I should have took an hour break and just went to the gym, but I didn't. I have midterms coming up as well, and I'm just hoping with the stress of it all that I don't forget to work out or lose track of my diet.
Lately I've just been lacking motivation. I think I'm heart broken. It sounds dramatic and I'm not usually one to claim being heart broken, but I know I'm sad as of late and it's completely cutting into how much I want to be in the gym.
I did go last night for about two hours. Worked out til my arms felt like limp noodles, and conquered my cardio. I just gotta go no matter what. I have to find the time to get there. It's only 1-2 hours of my day.
Here's to a better end to week 2 and a better start to week 3.
This week hasn't been the greatest. While I am on track with my diet and following her plan, my time management skills have been lacking on making it to the gym. I've done the at-home exercises she listed, but I haven't found the time to do the cardio. I had a semi huge exam for one of my classes that I didn't feel prepared for, so I was staying up til 1 am almost every night studying. I should have took an hour break and just went to the gym, but I didn't. I have midterms coming up as well, and I'm just hoping with the stress of it all that I don't forget to work out or lose track of my diet.
Lately I've just been lacking motivation. I think I'm heart broken. It sounds dramatic and I'm not usually one to claim being heart broken, but I know I'm sad as of late and it's completely cutting into how much I want to be in the gym.
I did go last night for about two hours. Worked out til my arms felt like limp noodles, and conquered my cardio. I just gotta go no matter what. I have to find the time to get there. It's only 1-2 hours of my day.
Here's to a better end to week 2 and a better start to week 3.
Friday, September 26, 2014
Week One: Days 2 - 5 Fat Girl Problems!
Days 2 thru 4 was GREAT!
There was a lot of food listed on my menu, and I just couldn't eat it all. Heidi stresses to not eat when you aren't hungry, so I listened to my body.
Besides the strength training, she had me doing Cardio. Which consisted of treadmill work. It's usually walking at a moderate to fast pace for 25-30 minutes. I actually walked the whole 25-30 minutes without stopping to take a breather or anything. I like to call that a Non-scale Victory #NSV
Usually when I've done that, I had to rest after 5 or so minutes, just from my back getting sore or my breathing being uncontrolled. Every other day she has me do alternating speeds. 2 minutes moderate, 1 minute fast. While I completed it, I realized I needed to work on my breathing. I was getting out of breath on some parts and I really wanted to stop but I didn't.
The menu's been good, she included a recipe for a chicken salad, that reminded me so much of Costco's Sonoma Chicken Salad. It was good.
Day 5 - The Day From Hell!!!!
Yesterday sucked!!! I wasn't in a good mood, I didn't sleep well, I had so much to do, but not of things I needed to do. I felt behind, and I still currently do. I'm just overwhelmed I guess.
Anyway yesterday I had zero motivation and there were so many temptations it was absolutely ridiculous. I had taken my father for lunch because I hadn't seen him in a while. We went to the local seafood restaurant. I ordered a bake tilapia filet with roasted zucchini and squash. It was delicious, but my father order Coconut Shrimp. It looked and smelled so wonderful! He offered me some every 5 minutes. I think he saw me staring. You really just can't compare baked tilapia to coconut shrimp. They are on two different levels. :(
Then he wanted me to buy him a candy bar so I did. He just had to have a reeses peanut butter cup.
Then I had gone to the gym. I didn't feel like it, I had zero motivation, but I wasn't set to fail in my first week of this program. I was only able to walk for 20 minutes. Everything just felt off and I couldn't get myself to go another 10 minutes even though I was watching Shane Dawson YouTube videos to attempt to make the time go by fast. But that 20 minutes felt like a dramatic 2 hours. Then when I went to go to the machines and free weights, everything seemed so heavy. It's not like my body is so damn sore that I can't lift anything, my head just wasn't in it. So I completed my reps as best as I could and left the gym not feeling satisfied.
It was also my brother's birthday yesterday. So he invited us over to chill out with him and have dinner. He was ordering Chinese Food. So I prepared myself and brought a turkey burger patty, a slice of Ezekiel bread, and some cucumbers and bell peppers that I put lemon juice, pink salt and pepper on. Was it good? Yes. Was it torture to watch my parents and brother eat egg rolls and sesame chicken? HELL FUCKING YES IT WAS!!
Then of course I started having the worst sweet tooth. My inner fat girl wanted me to have an oreo blizzard so bad! It didn't help that my brother's roommates do the shopping for them and their kids and it was 80% junk food. I was surrounded by poptarts, cookies, candy and all this stuff I can't have, but yet craved. I kept sipping water hoping the cravings would disappear. They didn't. I left as soon as I could, and went straight to bed. Sleep off the sweet cravings.
Day 5 sucked!!! :-/ I just felt miserable in my own skin, and was basically having a giant ass pity party! FUCK YOU EMOTIONS!!!
There was a lot of food listed on my menu, and I just couldn't eat it all. Heidi stresses to not eat when you aren't hungry, so I listened to my body.
Besides the strength training, she had me doing Cardio. Which consisted of treadmill work. It's usually walking at a moderate to fast pace for 25-30 minutes. I actually walked the whole 25-30 minutes without stopping to take a breather or anything. I like to call that a Non-scale Victory #NSV
Usually when I've done that, I had to rest after 5 or so minutes, just from my back getting sore or my breathing being uncontrolled. Every other day she has me do alternating speeds. 2 minutes moderate, 1 minute fast. While I completed it, I realized I needed to work on my breathing. I was getting out of breath on some parts and I really wanted to stop but I didn't.
The menu's been good, she included a recipe for a chicken salad, that reminded me so much of Costco's Sonoma Chicken Salad. It was good.
Day 5 - The Day From Hell!!!!
Yesterday sucked!!! I wasn't in a good mood, I didn't sleep well, I had so much to do, but not of things I needed to do. I felt behind, and I still currently do. I'm just overwhelmed I guess.
Anyway yesterday I had zero motivation and there were so many temptations it was absolutely ridiculous. I had taken my father for lunch because I hadn't seen him in a while. We went to the local seafood restaurant. I ordered a bake tilapia filet with roasted zucchini and squash. It was delicious, but my father order Coconut Shrimp. It looked and smelled so wonderful! He offered me some every 5 minutes. I think he saw me staring. You really just can't compare baked tilapia to coconut shrimp. They are on two different levels. :(
Then he wanted me to buy him a candy bar so I did. He just had to have a reeses peanut butter cup.
Then I had gone to the gym. I didn't feel like it, I had zero motivation, but I wasn't set to fail in my first week of this program. I was only able to walk for 20 minutes. Everything just felt off and I couldn't get myself to go another 10 minutes even though I was watching Shane Dawson YouTube videos to attempt to make the time go by fast. But that 20 minutes felt like a dramatic 2 hours. Then when I went to go to the machines and free weights, everything seemed so heavy. It's not like my body is so damn sore that I can't lift anything, my head just wasn't in it. So I completed my reps as best as I could and left the gym not feeling satisfied.
It was also my brother's birthday yesterday. So he invited us over to chill out with him and have dinner. He was ordering Chinese Food. So I prepared myself and brought a turkey burger patty, a slice of Ezekiel bread, and some cucumbers and bell peppers that I put lemon juice, pink salt and pepper on. Was it good? Yes. Was it torture to watch my parents and brother eat egg rolls and sesame chicken? HELL FUCKING YES IT WAS!!
Then of course I started having the worst sweet tooth. My inner fat girl wanted me to have an oreo blizzard so bad! It didn't help that my brother's roommates do the shopping for them and their kids and it was 80% junk food. I was surrounded by poptarts, cookies, candy and all this stuff I can't have, but yet craved. I kept sipping water hoping the cravings would disappear. They didn't. I left as soon as I could, and went straight to bed. Sleep off the sweet cravings.
Day 5 sucked!!! :-/ I just felt miserable in my own skin, and was basically having a giant ass pity party! FUCK YOU EMOTIONS!!!
Sunday, September 21, 2014
Week One: Day 1 and Happy Fridge
Day One of Heidi Somer's Meal & Training Plan.
I went grocery shopping. #HappyFridge I went to my local grocery store, and the other day I had gone to the farmers market. Definitely enjoying seeing my fridge full and nothing is "crap."
I'm also going to be working on my meal prep. Right now I have about 3-4 days worth of chicken in the oven. And I finally have a reason to use all my spices. I've always enjoyed Mrs. Dash because it is sodium free and tastes WONDERFUL! I was looking for that chipotle blend, but they were out at my market.
I went grocery shopping. #HappyFridge I went to my local grocery store, and the other day I had gone to the farmers market. Definitely enjoying seeing my fridge full and nothing is "crap."
I'm also going to be working on my meal prep. Right now I have about 3-4 days worth of chicken in the oven. And I finally have a reason to use all my spices. I've always enjoyed Mrs. Dash because it is sodium free and tastes WONDERFUL! I was looking for that chipotle blend, but they were out at my market.
MEALS FOR TODAY:
Heidi had said to eat when you are hungry, and since today is Sunday I was actually busy. I went grocery shopping, went to the gym, and have been doing homework ever since. So my meals have been minimal, but I have eaten. I need to learn to definitely eat breakfast though.
WORK OUT FOR TODAY:
Today at the gym I did the knee strengthening, push ups, and cardio she had planned. It looks so simple on paper, but she really did plan something for me that I truly felt was perfect for day one. Hopefully the rest of week one goes pretty well.
Friday, September 19, 2014
My Goals
On the questionnaire Heidi had me fill out, she asked what my Goals were.
I don't know specifics, any size smaller than what I am sounds great to me. Here's what I told her.
Vanity Reasons
I want to be smaller than what I am. I want to look cute in clothes. I want to feel better in clothes. I want to not have to shop online for my outfits, and I want to not have to go to the biggest size in the rack just find a few things for me to choose from, and everything looks "matronly." I want to not have to hold the camera at a high angle to prevent my double chins from showing. I want to be able to take a full length photo with my friends or when I'm traveling at a beautiful landmark. I'd really like to wear tank tops in public.
Lifestyle Reasons
I'd like to be able to fit on a roller coaster, or better yet fit in a car and be able to use the seat belt without an extender. I'd like to walk a flight of stairs without getting winded. I'd like to walk from the parking lot to my classroom without perspiring and feeling short of breath. I'd like to know when I go to a concert I can fit in the seats and not have to order an aisle seat ticket. I'd like to not have to buy two plane tickets. I'd like to be able to go hiking more. I'd like to be able to dance with my nieces without having to stop and rest.
Health Reasons
I want to be healthy. I want to be fit. Thankfully, even with the size I am, I'm "relatively" healthy, in the sense that I'm not on blood pressure meds, cholesterol meds, diabetic meds. I am pre-diabetic, but since I've started working out and cutting out fast food, my numbers had dropped and my doctor did say if I kept it up, I could be out of the "pre" range in 1-2 years. Everyone in my family is obese. My parents and grandmothers suffer from heart conditions, my father is diabetic and a stroke victim. Ideally, I don't want to end up like them.
I don't know specifics, any size smaller than what I am sounds great to me. Here's what I told her.
Vanity Reasons
I want to be smaller than what I am. I want to look cute in clothes. I want to feel better in clothes. I want to not have to shop online for my outfits, and I want to not have to go to the biggest size in the rack just find a few things for me to choose from, and everything looks "matronly." I want to not have to hold the camera at a high angle to prevent my double chins from showing. I want to be able to take a full length photo with my friends or when I'm traveling at a beautiful landmark. I'd really like to wear tank tops in public.
Lifestyle Reasons
I'd like to be able to fit on a roller coaster, or better yet fit in a car and be able to use the seat belt without an extender. I'd like to walk a flight of stairs without getting winded. I'd like to walk from the parking lot to my classroom without perspiring and feeling short of breath. I'd like to know when I go to a concert I can fit in the seats and not have to order an aisle seat ticket. I'd like to not have to buy two plane tickets. I'd like to be able to go hiking more. I'd like to be able to dance with my nieces without having to stop and rest.
Health Reasons
I want to be healthy. I want to be fit. Thankfully, even with the size I am, I'm "relatively" healthy, in the sense that I'm not on blood pressure meds, cholesterol meds, diabetic meds. I am pre-diabetic, but since I've started working out and cutting out fast food, my numbers had dropped and my doctor did say if I kept it up, I could be out of the "pre" range in 1-2 years. Everyone in my family is obese. My parents and grandmothers suffer from heart conditions, my father is diabetic and a stroke victim. Ideally, I don't want to end up like them.
Online Trainer - Heidi Somers
As mentioned in a previous post, I reached out to a dozen people and only one responded.
I should also mention that she responded in less than 24 hours.
In my first email, I told her about my struggles trying to find help. I told her my age and weight and that I need help, and that if she could have someone my size as a client, I'd greatly appreciate. I also told her that the way my personality is, I need black and white specifics. I need a weekly meal guide and grocery list. Counting calories does nothing for me because I can find shitty food to fill me up and still make my calories for the day.
Within her response were these words "Thank you for reaching out to me. I would LOVE to help you! My heart goes out to you for not receiving responses from other people!"
BAM! I was hooked. I may have even shed a tear. I felt a weight lifting off my shoulders, because FINALLY someone had accepted my plea. I immediately purchased her 6 week meal and training program, for less than $200, which is really cheap compared to the other 11 people I've met with.
I ended up filling out a questionaire and she wanted to two front and back pictures in a bra and shorts. Dear Lord in Heaven, that was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I probably have taken less than 10 full body pictures my entire life, so I was extremely disgusted with how I looked, but at the same time. The girl I was a year ago, would have NEVER done something like that. A year ago, if I hired her and she asked for a photo, I would have found a way out of it, or asked for a refund. So mentally I'm in a better place I think.
In a little over a week's time she had my workout plan, grocery list, and supplement list ready for me. She even said she had done research and spoke with doctors. Now whether she is saying that to me for me to think she's legit, or she actually did it, I don't care. I sincerely appreciate all her effort.
My workouts consist of Strength Training and Cardio. Cardio is not my friend. It's not that my legs hurt or that I get short of breath (those both happen) but my back starts to be the first thing that hurts, and I usually start to feel discourage and shorten my cardio time because of that. But I'm determined to make it all happen.
The Grocery list is truly not something different than what I buy. Back in January I made the switch to hormone free / organic meat. I did it more for the taste than the health factor. I was willing to pay a bit more for something that tasted 10x better than to deal with flavorless food. She really promotes organic and hormone free meats, fruits, and veggies. I have no problem with that.
The supplements are not out of the ordinary either. I've taken fish oil in the past and it became a matter of always forgetting to buy it. But she did say I needed GRAMS of oils not milligrams, so I had to buy the liquid oil. Oh that's a disgusting flavor. L-Carnintine as a natural fat burning, which I've never taken, but it's relatively inexpensive. So whatever. And the last thing on her supplement list was protein powder. Which I've always had some in stock, but she gave m a list of ones that were organic and all natural.
She gave me my meal plan as well, and bless her heart, she did it black and white and gave me specific breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks for a week. It all seems doable, and nothing is out of the ordinary. I just gotta go grocery shopping.
My online fitness trainer is Heidi Somers. I cannot thank her enough for responding, for being enthusiastic, and for taking the time to develop a plan specifically for someone my size. I can't wait to see the results after 6 weeks.
Here's her Facebook and Youtube Link to check her out.
Heidi Somers - Facebook
Heidi Somers - YouTube
I should also mention that she responded in less than 24 hours.
In my first email, I told her about my struggles trying to find help. I told her my age and weight and that I need help, and that if she could have someone my size as a client, I'd greatly appreciate. I also told her that the way my personality is, I need black and white specifics. I need a weekly meal guide and grocery list. Counting calories does nothing for me because I can find shitty food to fill me up and still make my calories for the day.
Within her response were these words "Thank you for reaching out to me. I would LOVE to help you! My heart goes out to you for not receiving responses from other people!"
BAM! I was hooked. I may have even shed a tear. I felt a weight lifting off my shoulders, because FINALLY someone had accepted my plea. I immediately purchased her 6 week meal and training program, for less than $200, which is really cheap compared to the other 11 people I've met with.
I ended up filling out a questionaire and she wanted to two front and back pictures in a bra and shorts. Dear Lord in Heaven, that was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I probably have taken less than 10 full body pictures my entire life, so I was extremely disgusted with how I looked, but at the same time. The girl I was a year ago, would have NEVER done something like that. A year ago, if I hired her and she asked for a photo, I would have found a way out of it, or asked for a refund. So mentally I'm in a better place I think.
In a little over a week's time she had my workout plan, grocery list, and supplement list ready for me. She even said she had done research and spoke with doctors. Now whether she is saying that to me for me to think she's legit, or she actually did it, I don't care. I sincerely appreciate all her effort.
My workouts consist of Strength Training and Cardio. Cardio is not my friend. It's not that my legs hurt or that I get short of breath (those both happen) but my back starts to be the first thing that hurts, and I usually start to feel discourage and shorten my cardio time because of that. But I'm determined to make it all happen.
The Grocery list is truly not something different than what I buy. Back in January I made the switch to hormone free / organic meat. I did it more for the taste than the health factor. I was willing to pay a bit more for something that tasted 10x better than to deal with flavorless food. She really promotes organic and hormone free meats, fruits, and veggies. I have no problem with that.
The supplements are not out of the ordinary either. I've taken fish oil in the past and it became a matter of always forgetting to buy it. But she did say I needed GRAMS of oils not milligrams, so I had to buy the liquid oil. Oh that's a disgusting flavor. L-Carnintine as a natural fat burning, which I've never taken, but it's relatively inexpensive. So whatever. And the last thing on her supplement list was protein powder. Which I've always had some in stock, but she gave m a list of ones that were organic and all natural.
She gave me my meal plan as well, and bless her heart, she did it black and white and gave me specific breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks for a week. It all seems doable, and nothing is out of the ordinary. I just gotta go grocery shopping.
My online fitness trainer is Heidi Somers. I cannot thank her enough for responding, for being enthusiastic, and for taking the time to develop a plan specifically for someone my size. I can't wait to see the results after 6 weeks.
Here's her Facebook and Youtube Link to check her out.
Heidi Somers - Facebook
Heidi Somers - YouTube
About Me
As I stated in my previous post, I'm 25 years old and I weigh 433 pounds, oh also I'm only 5'4" so I'm short and plump.
I'm not even sure what my heaviest weight was to be quite honest. I never owned a scale until this year. Now that scale is front in center in my kitchen, taunting me.
I've always been a big girl, and my family has also always been overweight. Part of me blames them for not showing me proper dietary habits, but when I got to the age where I knew right from wrong, and that eating this way was bad, I didn't stop. So that parental blame can only go so far.
When I was 13, I stopped drinking all sodas. Seriously, since then I've maybe had a handful of sodas. Usually sprite when I'm sick, but I truly can't stand any sort of carbonation. Water has always been my best friend since then and once in a while I've enjoyed sweet tea (I'm from Texas) and juice. The reason I stopped drinking soda was because I took a Health and Wellness course my freshman year of high school and I learned that Coke (Coca-Cola) could eat thru steel. I was only imagining what it could do to my insides, so from that day on I cut it out and went cold turkey. It was the easiest thing I did in my life.
Why was that easy, but changing my diet not?
I'm weird with emotions. I don't show them. I grew up with a very emotional mother, and their wasn't room for any more in the house. So if I may psychologically analyze myself, I think to avoid showing emotions, I ate them. I ate when I was happy, sad, angry etc all to keep "calm, cool, collected." Please note, I am in no way blaming my mother for that. I got that way from my Granny. I'm a lot like her, why feel the need to be stressed or sad, when things still needed to get done around the house? So it was easier for me to go about my day not dealing with the emotions, and just eating them and storing them away.
I know that's why I got fat. Then of course I had no idea what portion control was, so I had no self control. Ate til I got full beyond belief.
I never really got picked on. I grew up in a small town and I went to the same school from Pre-K to 12th Grade. I grew up with a brother who made me grow thick skin and stand up for myself. So anyone who tried to make fun of me, I ended up handling. And the older I got, the less I cared what people thought of me. I knew I was fat. I wasn't blind to it, I owned a full length mirror. There is nothing anyone could say that was new to me or that I didn't tell myself.
Despite being fat, I've had a pretty good life. I've traveled, I've had fun, I have some really great friends. My friends know I'm fat, but they don't see me that way. It's both a blessing and a curse. I love that they don't recognize me as just another fat girl, but at the same time they don't understand my limitations. Not being able to ride a roller coaster, sit in a booth at a restaurant, having to buy two airplane tickets. (Yes, I'm a big girl and I will buy two airplane seats, because not only do I want to be comfortable, but the person next me shouldn't feel uncomfortable either. Thank God for Southwest Airlines, they are the only airline I know that refunds the second seat. God Bless Them. )
As I was saying, even as a fat girl I've done a lot, seen a lot, I've fell in love and fell in lust, and I've had my heart broken just like any other average sized girl. Love knows no size!
I don't know what prompted me to officially start this journey. All I know is in May, I finally started making use of my gym membership. I started cutting out fast food. I was seeing improvement in my energy, my stamina, and even my PCP was seeing results in my blood work. I was feeling happy.
So I wanted to take the steps to do this all properly, I wanted to hire someone and I wanted to know the right things at the right time.
I'm not even sure what my heaviest weight was to be quite honest. I never owned a scale until this year. Now that scale is front in center in my kitchen, taunting me.
I've always been a big girl, and my family has also always been overweight. Part of me blames them for not showing me proper dietary habits, but when I got to the age where I knew right from wrong, and that eating this way was bad, I didn't stop. So that parental blame can only go so far.
When I was 13, I stopped drinking all sodas. Seriously, since then I've maybe had a handful of sodas. Usually sprite when I'm sick, but I truly can't stand any sort of carbonation. Water has always been my best friend since then and once in a while I've enjoyed sweet tea (I'm from Texas) and juice. The reason I stopped drinking soda was because I took a Health and Wellness course my freshman year of high school and I learned that Coke (Coca-Cola) could eat thru steel. I was only imagining what it could do to my insides, so from that day on I cut it out and went cold turkey. It was the easiest thing I did in my life.
Why was that easy, but changing my diet not?
I'm weird with emotions. I don't show them. I grew up with a very emotional mother, and their wasn't room for any more in the house. So if I may psychologically analyze myself, I think to avoid showing emotions, I ate them. I ate when I was happy, sad, angry etc all to keep "calm, cool, collected." Please note, I am in no way blaming my mother for that. I got that way from my Granny. I'm a lot like her, why feel the need to be stressed or sad, when things still needed to get done around the house? So it was easier for me to go about my day not dealing with the emotions, and just eating them and storing them away.
I know that's why I got fat. Then of course I had no idea what portion control was, so I had no self control. Ate til I got full beyond belief.
I never really got picked on. I grew up in a small town and I went to the same school from Pre-K to 12th Grade. I grew up with a brother who made me grow thick skin and stand up for myself. So anyone who tried to make fun of me, I ended up handling. And the older I got, the less I cared what people thought of me. I knew I was fat. I wasn't blind to it, I owned a full length mirror. There is nothing anyone could say that was new to me or that I didn't tell myself.
Despite being fat, I've had a pretty good life. I've traveled, I've had fun, I have some really great friends. My friends know I'm fat, but they don't see me that way. It's both a blessing and a curse. I love that they don't recognize me as just another fat girl, but at the same time they don't understand my limitations. Not being able to ride a roller coaster, sit in a booth at a restaurant, having to buy two airplane tickets. (Yes, I'm a big girl and I will buy two airplane seats, because not only do I want to be comfortable, but the person next me shouldn't feel uncomfortable either. Thank God for Southwest Airlines, they are the only airline I know that refunds the second seat. God Bless Them. )
As I was saying, even as a fat girl I've done a lot, seen a lot, I've fell in love and fell in lust, and I've had my heart broken just like any other average sized girl. Love knows no size!
I don't know what prompted me to officially start this journey. All I know is in May, I finally started making use of my gym membership. I started cutting out fast food. I was seeing improvement in my energy, my stamina, and even my PCP was seeing results in my blood work. I was feeling happy.
So I wanted to take the steps to do this all properly, I wanted to hire someone and I wanted to know the right things at the right time.
Start of it All
I started my official weight loss journey in May of this year. I say it's my "official" start because I've actually done more physical activity these last few months than I've done my whole life, besides when I was a kid of course. I've been a big girl all my life, and my family definitely has a history of obesity.
I am 25 years old and classified as morbidly obese. I weigh 433 lbs. I would like to say this is my highest weight, but it isn't. As I said, I started my journey in May and so I've actually lost some pounds and inches. YAY ME!
I started out by cutting out fast food, drinking 1 gallon of water a day, and going to the gym for 1.5 hours, 3 days a week. And it's worked, not as fast as I would like of course, but it took me 25 years to get to this weight, it's not going to disappear overnight. If someone comes across that magic healthy pill, send it my way.
I knew from the get go that I couldn't do this on my own.Since June of this year, I have seen 3 doctors, 3 nutritionists and have emailed about 6 online fitness trainers. Here are my results.
The 3 doctors. Yeah PROFESSIONAL LICENSED DOCTORS. They could care less. Each one wanted me to prescribe with an appetite suppressant, do blood work, wait 3 months, then come back and see them.
The 3 nutritionists. They tried to get me to buy shakes and supplements. I wanted macro coaching and meal plan, not sugary drinks and pills. A couple of them wanted me to do weight loss shots, and while I've seen that work for people, I couldn't afford $300/week in my budget.
The 6 online fitness people. Well 5 people ignored me, and one responded.
Out of literally a dozen people I spoke with, only one has decided to help me. I didn't think that when I finally reached out for help that NO ONE would respond. We live in a world where we body/fat shame, where obesity is bad, etc but yet when I want to seriously make an effort to change myself, no one helps.
I never ask for handouts. I wasn't expecting anything to be free. But those 12 people went in to their business to help people, and now they see people as dollar signs instead of actual human beings. I honestly thought, if they helped and if everything went according to plan I started to lose weight, wouldn't they want a client like me in their portfolio?
Shame on them. Shame on them for not doing their job properly. Shame on them for thinking money is more important than the health of a human being.
I am 25 years old and classified as morbidly obese. I weigh 433 lbs. I would like to say this is my highest weight, but it isn't. As I said, I started my journey in May and so I've actually lost some pounds and inches. YAY ME!
I started out by cutting out fast food, drinking 1 gallon of water a day, and going to the gym for 1.5 hours, 3 days a week. And it's worked, not as fast as I would like of course, but it took me 25 years to get to this weight, it's not going to disappear overnight. If someone comes across that magic healthy pill, send it my way.
I knew from the get go that I couldn't do this on my own.Since June of this year, I have seen 3 doctors, 3 nutritionists and have emailed about 6 online fitness trainers. Here are my results.
The 3 doctors. Yeah PROFESSIONAL LICENSED DOCTORS. They could care less. Each one wanted me to prescribe with an appetite suppressant, do blood work, wait 3 months, then come back and see them.
The 3 nutritionists. They tried to get me to buy shakes and supplements. I wanted macro coaching and meal plan, not sugary drinks and pills. A couple of them wanted me to do weight loss shots, and while I've seen that work for people, I couldn't afford $300/week in my budget.
The 6 online fitness people. Well 5 people ignored me, and one responded.
Out of literally a dozen people I spoke with, only one has decided to help me. I didn't think that when I finally reached out for help that NO ONE would respond. We live in a world where we body/fat shame, where obesity is bad, etc but yet when I want to seriously make an effort to change myself, no one helps.
I never ask for handouts. I wasn't expecting anything to be free. But those 12 people went in to their business to help people, and now they see people as dollar signs instead of actual human beings. I honestly thought, if they helped and if everything went according to plan I started to lose weight, wouldn't they want a client like me in their portfolio?
Shame on them. Shame on them for not doing their job properly. Shame on them for thinking money is more important than the health of a human being.
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